Joy, Hope, and Healing

 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. Jeremiah 29:11-12

Our Children were given to us for a reason. God.

He gave us Kate because he knew we needed to heal and she has brought that in mass amounts. She brings us healing, so much healing.

He gave us Mallory because he knew we could handle it, that her journey was going to bring us to where we are today. He knew her battle would be the one to break us and to bring us back again. She brings us hope, so much hope.

He gave us Jillian, our first sweet baby as a reminder of his unconditional love. Hearing our sweet girl sing songs to the Lord is something that has taught us that Children are precious and ultimately they belong to Him and we are just borrowing them here on Earth. She brings us Joy, so much Joy.

Ohhh sweet children I wish we could keep you this small forever. I wish we could bottle up your smell . I wish you would never have to hurt, or feel disappointment, or to grow weary...

Dear Lord please let us find a way to breathe our children in., to find a way to nurture them, to love them, and to help us everyday to do the right things for them. We thank you for lending them to us and will do everything we can to raise them to Love You, to know Your word, to obey it, and to really know You. Amen.

I was so angry, bitter, and resentful when Mallory was diagnosed. I would find myself screaming and cursing and just did not fair well through that period in our lives. The thing about that is when I look back at that I am so grateful for many things. Dear Lord I am so thankful. Amen.

My husband was also given to our children, and to me. He brings us Love, so much Love. One thing about marriage, about being with someone, is that you really have to work at it. The minute you stop giving is the minute everything starts crumbling. Ryan and I are survivors, survivors of something that could have easily left us broken and sent us our separate ways. From this we continue to search for healing, we continue to pray for guidance, and ultimately we need God for our marriage. Dear Lord I am so blessed for this man, my husband, that you have given to me. He has brought me such joy, love, and hope. I pray for our marriage that you would bring us closer together, that you would heal us, that you would show us how to Love more like you. We pray to be more God Like. Amen.